20 Aug 2002
The rules and suggestions in this weblog pamphlet are directed at errors in speaking, especially in public speaking, where a person's opportunities to embarrass himself occur at a much higher rate than in writing. Nevertheless, most of these comments also apply to written English.
Send comments and suggestions to:

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I. WORD MISUSE
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    Words are the smallest components of spoken language that contain meanings. The meanings in a speech or in a novel are ultimately dependent not only on the style and the syntax of the works, but ultimately on the meanings of the individual words. Misuse and mispronunication of words are the simplest errors in spoken English. They are also among the more common errors.

- “Words have meanings.” - “The Miracle Worker”
- “(Let) every word tell.” - William Strunk Jr.
- “Make every note a solo.” - Raphael Méndez
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COMMON MISUSES:

For a more exhaustive list of word misuses, see Common Errors in English - Paul Brians,Washington State University

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MALALPROPISMS:
- Errors caused by choosing a ludicrously inappropriate word.
You may never hear these specific examples, but the tendency is widespread.

“I am diabolically (devilishly) opposed to the motion.” - The speaker may have meant “diametrically” (as remote as possible), but the statement still wouldn’t make much sense.
“What promulgated (declared, forced) you to join our club?”
“I want to preempt (to take for oneself, to replace by priority) a blessed event.”
“I’m a very prolific (productive, especially related to producing offspring) reader.”
“I am reticent (inclined to silence) to file charges.”
“I wanna minute tuh masticate wid yuh.” - The Bowery Boys

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TOO MANY WORDS
- In each error below, there are too many words. This apparent redundancy reduces clarity.

Error: “There is a convoy heading northbound on I-81.”
Proper: “There is a convoy heading north on I-81.”
Proper: “There is a northbound convoy on I-81.”

Error: “Save 50% off.”
Proper “Save 50 %.”
Proper “Take 50% off.”

Error: “Residents may now return back to their homes.”
Proper: “Residents may now return to their homes.”
Proper: “Residents may now go back to their homes.”

Error: “Prepare for bad weather before it happens.”
Proper: “Prepare for bad weather.”

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“STUFF” WORDS (There may be a better term.)
- Used in place of more meaningful words, and even where no word is necessary
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Indefinite Relationship "Stuff":
In each of the following examples, the speaker is committed to, is in agreement with, is in sympathy with, understands or has at least received information about the object of the sentence. Other possibilities include any combination of the above, including none of the above.

Error: "I (can) relate to that."
Error: "I (can) identify with that."
Error: "I have no problem with that."
Error: "The proposed mall will impact the quality of the lake."

Such statements are often not followed by any clarifying statements. The speaker has conveyed no more information than he could have by using the more honest, if more colloquial, "Yeah, I hear ya."
If a speaker "relates to" or "identifies with" something, he could make his statements more informative by specifying the relationship.

"Impact", which means "to strike" or "to collide", is derived from "impinge", which means the same thing. In the above example, "impact" is used to mean "affect." A statement of what the effect the mall will have on the lake would be more informative.
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Filler "Stuff"
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"Situation"

Error: "Many employees are facing an unemployment situation."
Error: "Speeding can lead to a collision situation."
Error: "Emergency situation"
"Situation" serves no purpose in any of the three examples.

Proper: "Many employees are facing unemployment."; "Many employees are going to be fired."
Proper: "Speeding can lead to a collision."
Proper: "Emergency"
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"Process"

Error: "Recent bombings have threatened the peace process."
Proper: "Recent bombings have caused the treaty negotiations in Paris to be suspended." (Or perhaps the speaker means something else entirely.)
Adding "process" to words such as "peace", "healing", "grieving" and "planning" merely allows the speaker to complete a sentence without completing a thought.
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Other"Stuff"
"Individual"

Error: “There was an individual on my porch.”
Proper: “There was a salesman on my porch.”
"Individual" is not a fancy synonym for “person” or “human being”. “Individual” is an adjective, not a noun. When “individual” is used as a noun, the context must clearly answer the question, “Individual what?”
For example: “Legislators must strive for a balance between the good of society and the rights of the individual.”
This sentence is clear because “Individual what?” can be answered, “Individual member of society.”

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RECENT PECULIARITIES AND BARBARISMS
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"Ones"
Error: "These ones", "Those ones" "Give me a dozen of those ones."
Proper: "These", "Those". "Give me a dozen of those."
The plural of "one" is "two", or "three", etc. Excepting long-accepted uses such as “loved ones”, "ones" is no more acceptable than "gooses" or "mouses".
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"Nother"
Error: "That's a whole nother story."
Proper (or at least improved): "That's another whole story."
Note that "nother" isn't a word
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"have" versus "of"
Error: "I could of gone."
Proper: "I could have gone."
More on this under "Irregular Verbs"
This is more a problem in public speaking and writing than in casual conversation. While "could have" and "could of" are frequently indistinguishable in conversation, lower tempo and greater articulation in public speaking can make this error more noticeable.
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"use"(to employ) v. "utilize"(to make useful)
"Utilize" is not a new word, but its use (or "utilization", if you prefer) is displacing "use" in writing and in public speaking.
The distinction between these two words is difficult to remember and is not obviously useful. E.g., I can "use" a shovel to dig a hole. That's what shovels are for. However, I would "utilize" a feed scoop for the same purpose.
Recommendation: Don't utilize "utilize" at all; use "use" instead. No meaning will be lost through the use of "use", and it sounds less pretentious.
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Error : "Old adage"
An "adage"(saying creditable through long use) is old by definition. "Old adage" is redundant.
Error: "Old axiom"
An "axiom" (self-evident or agreed-upon statement) has no age. An axiom is true at time of use.
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Error: “different than”
Proper: “different from”
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“obligated” v. “obliged”
Error: “Dr. Laura: Am I obligated to …?”
Proper: “Dr. Laura: Am I obliged to …?”
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Error: “Firstly”, “Lastly”, Most importantly”, “Secondly”
These appear to be adverbs, as many English adverbs are formed by appending “ly” to adjectives.
However, “importantly” is usually heard as a sentence fragment in an adjective sense.
Error: “Most importantly, the Council’s decision …”
Proper: “The most important consequence of the Council’s decision …”

Error: “Thusly”
“Thus” is already an adverb. Appending “ly” to “thus” is meaningless.
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The gradient “Excellent, good, fair and poor” has become “Awesome, cool, whatever and sucks”

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MISPRONOUNCIATIONS

Common Mispronunciations
"Febuary"or "Feberary" for "February"
"Reconize" for "Recognize"
"Interduce" for "Introduce"
"Deteriating" for "Deteriorating"
“Saracuse” for “Syracuse” Proper: SIR-a-cuse, Gr. or SEER-a-cuse, L.

Unusual Mispronunciations
"Inclandescent"
"Corporal Tunnel Syndrome"

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II. GRAMMAR AND SYNTAX PROBLEMS
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PRONOUNS, REFLEXIVE - "Myself", "yourself", "himself", "herself", "itself", "ourselves", "yourselves", "themselves"
(There is no "hisself", "themself", "ourself", "theirself", or "theirselves".)

"I" and "me" are precise and useful words, but there is a drift toward substituting "myself" for these.
Error: "Please give your ticket money to Susan or myself." (Use "me" or "to me" for "myself".)
Error: "Larry, George and myself visited the Adirondacks last week." (Use "I" for myself".)
Error: "Myself visited the Adirondacks." (While this is obviously wrong, it is equivalent to the above example.)
Error: "It seemed that way to myself." (... "to me")

Rule: The reflexive pronoun is used as a direct or indirect object when the object is the same as the subject.

Proper: "I bought myself a radio." "He injured himself." "I was talking to myself."

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PRONOUNS - CASE VIOLATIONS

Error: "Each student should hand in their homework."
Proper: "Each student should hand in his homework."
or "Each student should hand in his or her homework."
or “All students should hand in their homework assignments."

Error: "I am asking everyone to confirm your assignments."
Proper: "I am asking everyone to confirm his assignment."
or "I am asking everyone to confirm his or her assignment."
or "I am asking each of you to confirm your assignment."

Error: “Me and Jim are going out tonight.”
Proper: “Jim and I are going out tonight.”

Error: “Ted is going with Jim and I.”
Proper: “Ted is going with Jim and me.”

For a full development see Purdue's Online Writing Lab (OWL)

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IRREGULAR VERBS

Errors:
“could (or should) have went”; “could have gave”; “could have sang”
“have got”
“have to”

For a full development see Purdue's Online Writing Lab (OWL)

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MIXED METHAPHORS

I am a bit reluctant to list these. A well-mixed metaphor has often added unexpected color and humor to a dull speech.
However, mixed metaphors and crumbling clichés can be embarrassing to the speaker.

"People were dropping in like flies."
"It's time for the hens and chickens and cows to come home."
"He could change on a dime."
"Good taste is in the eye of the beholder."
"He would give you the hair shirt off his back" - Readers' Digest
"Take the bull by the tail and face the situation" - ? - Maybe Louis B. Mayer
"..if you open that Pandora's Box, you never know what Trojan 'orses will jump out." - Ernest Bevin; related by George Will
“Time to get down to brass knuckles” - Jack laFlamme
“… in and out like a yo-yo” - related by Dr. Ed Serow

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HOMOGENEOUS VOCABULARY

Case Study - The dilution and replacement of “Important”

Error: "It is imperative (commanded) that you sign up for the bowling team today.
While grammatically correct, this is strong language for a bowling team notice.
Proper: "Sign up today if you wish to be on the bowling team this year."

English has no word defined to mean all of the following:
- of dire consequence
- necessary
- of special interest to
- significant.
By 1940, however, sloppy usage had converted "important" (carrying significance) to this purpose.
As ‘important” came to be used to mean anything that somebody felt should be attended to by himself or by anybody else, it lost its power as a word.

“A word that means everything means nothing.” - ?

Seeking words that would mean “more important”, speakers drafted other related words, and used them to indicate varying but unagreed-upon levels of importance:

“Urgent” - Urging, Pressing
“Crucial” - Cruciform, required for resolution of an issue
“Critical” - Discernable, crucial (word is extremely corrupted)
“Imperative” - Commanded
“Mandatory” - Commanded
“Essential” - Inherent
“Fundamental” and "Basic" - Underlying ground or foundation

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III. LONG-TERM SUGGESTIONS
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1. Purchase a good etymological dictionary.
The best combination of thoroughness, scholarship, portability, and price is probably:
Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary, 1557 pages, $30.00
Merriam-Webster, Springfield MA
Now in 11th Edition

2. Use your dictionary.
- when reading
- when writing
- when preparing a speech
Even when conversing, it is easy to remember words to look up later

3. Purchase a style book.
One of the best and most concise is:
The Elements of Style, William Strunk Jr.and E.B.White
MacMillan & Colliers, 92 pages, $11.95

4. Use (not utilize) the Web.

Paul Brians - Washington State University
Common Errors in English
Includes an excellent error list with explanations

An Underground Guide to Literacy Even in Termpapers
Good examples of grammar use and misuse

OWL - Online Writing Lab - Purdue University
Grammar guides

© 2002 Halway Systems

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